10/24/1997

Actual excerpt from my diary:

Well, an eventful week or so. Tuesday the 21st was my 20th birthday. The night before it, I spent with David. We had a few drinks together at Beefeater's Pub, then made divine, slow love by candlelight in his room.

Tuesday, I went out to dinner with my friend Dave Keesey. It was fun. I was upset though, because David never even called me to say Happy Birthday. So after I got done with Keesey, I went to the restaurant to get my paycheck, and then went over to see David.

He wasn't home. His brother's girlfriend told me he'd been out with his uncle Jude but came home around 10:30 p.m., then went back out by himself. I knew exactly what was happening--David got paid at least $400 that very day.

I went home, very worried.

The next morning, I called him at work. He never showed up, and didn't even call out sick. His uncle Chuck asked me if I knew where he was. Of course not, but I knew exactly what he'd been doing.

David finally came home, almost a full 24 hours after he'd left. He told me that he'd spent $300 on crack. Jesus Christ, in less than 24 hours! He said he was trying to smoke enough to make his heart explode.

At least he's safe for now. But for how long?

Tonight, he called me and asked me to see a movie with him, his uncle Jude, and Jude's friend Stephanie. We had a REALLY nice time. It was a lot of fun. David was very sweet and affectionate, making sure to hold my hand or keep his arm around me. We kept kissing often, too.

Then we came back to his house and made incredible love. It was so beautiful. He told me how he loves to watch himself disappear into me, and how special it is.

Afterwards, we were lounging around his room naked, talking and goofing off. he said so much to me. He went off on how beautiful I am. Then he apologized for his disappearing act and wished me a happy birthday.

"Wow, the big two-oh. Damn, what am I gonna do next year when you're twenty-one? I'll have to chain you to my bed."

"Why?" I asked him.

"Because," he said, "all those drunk bastards groping you, all over you like a cheap suit. You're mine forever--and a day!"

I just giggled. Then we started talking about my job at the restaurant, about the guys in the kitchen. I said, "Ha, you don't even want to know HALF of what goes on there."

He joked, "Yeah? I'll have to go over there and tell them to quit looking at my girl, or else I'll kill them."

I laughed again. Then he kissed me on the back of my head and said softly in my ear, "Can I ask you a silly question?"

I said, "No such thing as a silly question."

He asked, "WILL you be my girl?"

I smiled and said, "Honey, I've ALWAYS been your girl."

He also asked me to wear his arrowhead chain again when I first got to his house tonight.

I love him, love him, love him!!!! God, I am in love with him. Keeping my fingers crossed.